(n.) a person who is very knowledgeable and enthusiastic about masturbation, and invests in only the finest lubes and/or sex toys in order to achieve the highest levels of independent sexual gratification.
You may like to stroke it, good sir, but I am a masturbaficionado — I take such things seriously.
(noun) The state of needing to urinate as much and as often as you drink, with an immediacy that seems to increase with every sip; generally associated with binge-drinking over a long period of time. See also: Breaking the Seal.
After six Red Hooks, three double Jamesons, an unfortunate shot of Patron and a fru-fru drink I finished while my date was in the bathroom, I have at last achieved peequilibrium. Please escort me to the nearest hospital or detox center, thank you.
(n.) 1. A complex non-procedure in which a wife withholds sex from her husband after the couple decided to stop having children, thus negating the need for the husband to get an actual vasectomy. 2. The most effective form of birth control ever conceived by (wo)man.
Q: Hey, man, did you get snipped?
A: Nah, my wife gave me a Catholic vasectomy instead.